Lesson 2, family dynamics

Hello fam! Well another week has passed and I have learned yet another interesting lesson in my family relations class! You may notice that everyone has a different kind of relation with their parents and their siblings. Have you ever wondered why that is? Let's consider our boundaries. We all love our personal space right? But personal space for you can be public space for someone else. As a kid growing up I found that the boundary between my mother and I was very thin. I am the fifth out of six children and played a key role in comforting my mom. My oldest brother had a drug addiction and this destroyed my mother. Because of the many opportunities that I had to comfort my Mom i found that she was who I went to for comfort and for advice.

My relationship with my dad on the other hand was very much the opposite. My dad to me was the punisher, and I am not talking about the Punisher that you see in comic books with a machine gun in each hand shooting up the place, but rather he was the person you never wanted to yell your name. I remember as a kid I hated wearing underwear! I couldn't stand it, so I would frequently attend school without underwear. After my parents caught on to this my dad would ask me if i wore underwear... I would lie of course, but when my dad would check I knew I was in for trouble. His favorite punishment was to give me a spoonful of Tabasco, and he wonders why I hate spicy food now.

The point I am trying to make by describing the relationship I had with my two parents is that the boundaries drawn between us are very different. Like I said I would frequently go to my mother for help and comfort whereas with y dad I would generally try to stay out of his way and to this very day I don't keep him very informed on my personal life.

As a class we started to think about what the ideal boundaries would be for a family and we agreed that the boundaries between mom and dad should be a little more rigid or personal and as a result the children would create a strong bond with their siblings, but wouldn't exclude their parents.

One thing that is very common when a couple decides to have kids is that the mom creates a very strong bond with her their children and the father sees that strong bond as a sign that the mother doesn't need the father anymore and he distances himself. In other, less common cases the father sees it as a challenge and establishes that strong, more rigid boundary with his wife. The result of this is that they raise the child with a healthy relationship with both parents. I would like to invite you all to think about the boundaries between you and your family members and think about the boundaries you would like to make with your spouse and children. As you strive to have that ideal boundary with your family you will be able to feel a balance in the relationships. Have fun trying to realize these boundaries and feel free to comment! Love you fam!

So I had an awesome week this week! In class we got to talking about the roles we play in our families. It is an interesting concept if you think of what purpose you serve as part of your family. It could vary depending on how many brothers and sisters we have or how our parents get along with their siblings. For me I feel like I play the balance in the family. My brothers and my father are very hot headed while my sisters and my mom are more passive and relaxed people so I play the peacemaker or everyone's friend. I have no way to tell if my father and his brothers act the same way as our family because we simply have never met any of his brothers, that's right I don't know any of my uncles except for one. My mother is a single child so there isn't much to compare our family to. I love the idea of the family and how each member plays a crucial role and how it gives us a sense of purpose. I am interesting in hearing all of your roles in your family with a short explanation of what your family is like. Maybe just for fun you can try to play a different role and see how your family reacts! Let me know how it turns out!

Lesson 1

This week in class we talked about a very interesting topic. We had a discussion on the population of the earth and how having a large family has become something that is looked down on in recent years. It is interesting to think that in the middle ages and for almost the whole history of the world men and women thought of their kids as their legacy, but something over the years has caused us to see children as more of a responsibility. Many of us are very familiar with the baby boom generation as the generation where people just couldn't stop having babies, but babies weren't the only thing that wouldn't stop popping out. Theories of over-population plagued the minds of the American people and ever since children have been looked at very differently. By 2065 the world is projected to to start depopulating. Children are royalty and they are our personal legacies, the way we teach our children shows a whole lot about how we are as people. I feel like we owe it to our children, or in some cases future children, to be the best we can be and to treat them like the sons and daughters of God that we are. If we see our children like the angels of God that they really are a desire to have more kids will more than likely develop in our hearts. I am eternally grateful for my awesome parents who treated me like an angel even though I behaved like a little devil! The family is awesome and we have the wonderful opportunity to make the world a better place one well taught child at a time.

Introduction

Hello friends! I am Britt LeFevre! I am twenty two years old, I am from Irvine California born and raised. I lived in the Dominican Republic for a couple years of my life and currently I am studying and Brigham Young University in Idaho. I am the fifth out of six children in my amazing family. My father is an entrepreneur and my mom always stayed home to take care of me. I served as a missionary for the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints for two years and I am a supporter and defender of the traditional family.